I Was Gone Perilously Close to a Month and all I Brought You was a Stupid Bulleted List Cop-Out Post...

...and what is likely the longest title EVER.

Things I Have Been Wondering About

• How do I keep cutting open the same mole when I shave my legs?
• After, I'm not kidding, 20+ years of wearing contacts, why do I still turn my head when I'm looking to the side to try to dislodge a foreign object?
• How come I can remember to buy the meat to make for lunches but not remember to cook all of it before it goes bad?
• Why am I totally proud that when Katherine of Daily Tragedies and I went wine tasting in Napa on Saturday we drank so much that we both fell asleep at a picnic table after we ate dinner? Seriously, we only woke up when the bitchy chick from the winery said "Excuse me...EXCUSE ME, we are closing now." BTW, more on that later...
• Did TypePad change things around or have I just been gone THAT long?
• Just how much Sport Shield has transferred from my inner thighs (it keeps me from setting them ablaze when I am running) to the driver's seat of my car?
• Will I ever be able to do the 13.1 again without stopping once (or three times) to pee (my first time out I did it, but that seemed to be a one-hit wonder)? More on this later, too...
• What in the world made me think I was motivated enough to tackle not one but TWO online classes this past semester? Dismal!
• How much do I have to spend in parking fees ($10 a day, everyday I drive in instead of taking the train, which I have PREPAID) to start going to bed, and thus getting up, on time?
• Will no amount of post-workout sweat keep me from hitting the Win Co?
• Why are my nostrils currently two different sizes? The right one appears to be swollen. Is it an unerupted pimple? A giant booger? A bug from the trail? Could be ANYTHING...
• Will I ever realize that no matter how much fun it looks like it is on Dancing With the Stars, attempting to learn the Quick Step could only end in heartache?
• Can Steve Guttenberg be stopped?!?

Comments

[Vanessa]

I now live in a different part of the country and let me tell you....I really miss the WinCo!!!

[Aimee]

good news is that no matter how sweaty you are, you still smell fresher than 90% of those who shop at Winco. Go you!

[Superfantastic]

I believe Steve Guttenberg has already been stopped by a little something called the 1990s.

[TidalWave]

i really enjoyed reading this

[TidalWave]

i really enjoyed reading this